Humphrey: the old and tired elf

By now everyone has heard of elf on the shelf. A very cute concept to reenforce your children’s need to behave before Christmas.

My children came home this weekend thrilled that they have an elf at their dads. I too am very excited for their elf adventures that they’ll be having.

Then the question came “why doesn’t OUR elf move?”
I replied “he does but our elf was made in 1960 so he’s old and tired and he knows I expect you guys to behave all the time, not just when he’s watching. Besides he’s like the old man of the elf kingdom, do you really want a cranky old man reporting about you?” At this the children laughed and forgave our elf for just loafing about (besides I don’t want to take away from something that could become a special tradition to the kids at their dads house).

Before bed the kids became insistent that our elf be a more active role in our house (again, I’m not ANTI elf but this is a tradition that their dads family is creating, I don’t want to take away from it). So I chuckled and told the kids “he’s probably going to start moving around because he’s getting annoyed with all this talk of the other elf but I really think your elf at your dads is where it’s at.”
The little mice ignored me and became thrilled that our elf, that I named Humphrey years ago and really was made in 1960 might DO something *sighs*.

This morning they found him sprawled out in the manger, and the Christ child? Where was he?
Kap loudly exclaimed “Jesus is ok he’s by the black wise man!”
To which I replied “well thank god, he put baby Jesus at the top of the tree last year.”
I did tell them that he’s never liked the name Humphrey and was most unhappy when I gave it to him. They’re now calling him Steve.

The kids are happy and while I have to carry this thing out till Christmas I believe I’ve kept their expectations low and the spotlight off of Humphrey and on their other elf instead. Besides, I suck the fun out of our elf by reminding the kids I expect them to behave year round regardless of who or what is watching.

Mission accomplished.
Humphrey is a drag.

And between you and me because he’s not an elf on a shelf and instead, just tired ol Humphrey-Steve, he’s my favorite.

The picture below is Humphrey last year, in the bathroom, where he sat the WHOLE holiday season.

In the peace and quiet…



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